A Day in the DigiWorld
by Crayon
Summary: The Digi-Destined go unconscious a lot in the long search for their Digimon. The gang finally makes it home only to be confronted by rabid Yama fangirls. Tai is still used as a battering ram. Finished!
1. In which the the Digi-Destined really sm...

Dayin!

Hey there, I'm trying my hand at a humor fic. Hope you like it! Err... about the title, it's probably going to end up as more than one day... sorry about that.  
  
Disclaimer- Don't own Digimon.  
  
* * * * *  
  


A DAY IN THE DIGIWORLD  
  
(In which the the Digi-Destined really smeg up.)  
  
  


  
It was a beautiful night in the Digiworld. Tai looked around with his mini-telescope. Everything was normal. Mimi had grabbed Sora and was doing her hair while Palomon restrained her. Joe was digging around in his backpack for something. Gomamon was swimming around in the lake nearby. T.K. and Patamon were playing a hand-clapping game. Kari was playing Frogger® on Izzy's computer, with Gatomon watching happily. Matt was throwing small, innocent, digimon into the campfire, and Izzy and Tentomon had fallen asleep. The early bird catches the worm! he said, as he dozed off.  
  
Tai yawned as he pushed the sleeping Augumon off his shoe. A slight breeze hit him in the face and he sat down and rested his head on Augumon. He noticed all the others were falling asleep. He closed his eyes and immediatly fell asleep, too.  
  
* * * * *  
  
  
Tai awoke to everyone staring at him. Mimi had her nose turned up, Kari was clicking her tounge in pity, and Sora was stifling laughter. Mimi had put Sora's hair into braids, each one tied with a small pink ribbon.   
  
Why are you staring at me? Tai yawned.  
  
Umm... we just were waiting for you to get up. Kari said, avoiding her brother's eyes.  
  
Dude! You snored so loud, I'm suprised you didn't wake yourself up! Matt said.  
  
Tai glared at Matt who was in hysterics.  
  
Some people look as they could do with a blanket when they are sleeping. You looked like you could do with medical attention. Izzy tried to keep a straight face.   
  
Everyone burst out laughing. Izzy continued. Your legs were open, in a kind of suggestiable position, and you drooled. Once you deposited the drool onto your lap, your head tipped back to re-supply more drool. Izzy pointed at Tai's lap. A small wet spot had formed.  
  
Tai growled. Shut up!  
  
T.K. stopped lauging. Hey, where's Patamon? The small kid screamed at the top of his lungs for his rodent friend. PATAMON? PATAMON!!! WHERE ARE YOOUUUU???  
  
Tai looked around. Augumon wasn't here either. Or, for that matter, Biyomon, Tentomon, Gabumon, Palomon, Gatomon, or Gomamon.  
  
Where could they be? cried Mimi.  
  
Biyomon? Biyomon!! BIYOMON!!!! Sora yelled.  
  
That's really gonna help, Sora. Matt said sarcastically.  
  
Well, it's better than just sitting there, like you are!  
  
Oh, and screaming helps a lot. Yea...  
  
Shut up!  
  
Make me!  
  
I will! Sora lunged at Matt. Tai and Joe held her back. She scratched at their arms, but they held fast. Let... me... GO!!!  
  
She's getting pissed, Tai. Maybe we should. Joe grunted as Sora's hand hit his nose.  
  
Matt laughed, but walked away. he said under his breath.  
  
Sora pulled out of their grip. She glared at Matt, but didn't start at him. Let's just find the digimon. Sora put her helmet on with some difficulty over her braids.  
  
I think the most logical way to search for them is to split up into pairs. Izzy said, as he watched everyone look at everyone, nodding in agreement. ...that I assign. Izzy finished.  
  
Everyone groaned. Izzy typed on his computer, mumbling to himself. Tai and Matt, no that would be suicide. Sora and Matt, no, that would be the end of the Digital World as we know it. T.K. and Kari, no, they are to young to go together... He finally came up with some answers. Allright! Tai and I will go north, and Matt and Mimi will go east, Kari and Joe will go west, and Sora and T.K. will go south.   
  
Sora groaned. She glanced at T.K. You mean to say I'm stuck with the bratty little... She stopped. T.K.'s eyes welled up with tears... God damn. she muttered underneath her breath. C'mon, T.K. Let's go. She dragged him off.  
  
Mimi batted her eyes at Matt. Matt! What luck! This will be so much fun!   
  
Yea, fun. Matt put his hands in his pockets and walked off.  
  
MATTIE!!! WAIT FOR MEEEEE!!!! screamed Mimi, following Matt at a run.  
  
Joe fixed his glasses. We'll go in a second. First... He rummaged in his bag. Inhaler, Vitamin A, B, C, and E pills, cough syrup, first aid kit, hay fever medicine, allergy medicine...  
  
Kari tapped her foot impatiantly.  
  
Now where are my eye drops? Ahhh! There they are! All set! Ready to go, Kari? Joe looked up. Kari was already heading west to a large forest. Joe sighed and followed.  
  
Izzy and Tai looked at each other. Ready, freddie? Izzy said, with too much enthusiasm.  
  
My name's Tai. Tai grumbled.  
  
Figure of speech. Izzy opened his laptop. Good work, Izzy! I think you are ready to move onto Level Six! Socializing at parties! Izzy smiled at his computer.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Matt was almost a mile ahead of Mimi. She had stopped to fix her sandal. Sometimes, but very rarely, Matt would yell something like, COME ON ALREADY! or IF YOU MOVED ANY SLOWER, YOU'D BE WALKING BACKWARDS! Matt sat next to a tree and waited for Mimi.  
  
After five minutes of waiting, she came puffing around and flopped down next to Matt. He stood up. Finally. I thought you might be lost. I was worried.  
  
Mimi smiled.  
  
Your parents could have sued me if you got lost. Matt continued on his way.  
  
Mimi glared at his back and flipped him off, but grudgingly continued, dragging her feet.  
  
They reached at large river. Sitting on the top of a hill on the other side of the river was a large temple. From somewhere inside, long, high-pitched mews cried out in pain. That would be our digimon. Matt sighed. He found a long chain of rocks across the river and hopped over to the other side. Mimi stared at him. Well, don't just stare. Move it! yelled Matt.  
  
You must be crazy! My shoes will just not hold up on those rocks! And if I fell in...  
  
Heavan forbid. Matt said sarcastically.  
  
And if I fell in, Mimi continued, Do you know how much this dress cost me?!?  
  
No, and I don't care, but I have a feeling you are going to tell me. Matt smirked.  
  
She glared at him. It cost me almost a hundred dollars! If I fell in, It would ruin it! She stamped her foot.  
  
What a waste of money... Matt mumbled under his breath. Nonetheless, he grabbed a long branch and procceded to get Mimi to the other side. She did fall in. Twice.  
  
YAAAHHHHHHHH!!!! C-C-COOOLLDD!!!'  
  
Make that three times.  
  
* * * * *  
  
  
Master Piedmon?   
  
Are you speaking to me, worthless scum?  
  
The small digimon gritted his teeth at the clown's remark.  
  
Your plan seems to be working with flying colors. Two of the digi-destined have already come to the labyrinth at the sound of my whimpering duck calls.  
  
Excellent. But there are still six more to go! Get them here, you putrid slimeball!  
  
Yes, your excellency. The digimon walked away, muttering unspeakable words under his breath.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Thirty-seven... thirty-eight... Joe swallowed another pill.  
  
Kari sighed. Is that a temple up there? She said, squinting at a large hill with a temple like structure at the top.  
  
Thirty- wha? Joe looked at the temple. I suppose it is... He looked back down. Oh man, I just lost count. One... He swallowed a pill.  
  
Kari sighed again.  
  
* * * * *  
  
  
Do you like Telletubbies?  
  
  
  
Do you like Sesame Street?  
  
  
  
Do you like-  
  
Sora was busy taking the braids out of her hair. T.K. was trying to start a conversation between them. He sighed and put his hands up to the bonfire Sora had started. He squinted as he looked up to a hillside. Is that a-  
  
  
  
As I was saying, Is that a temple? T.K. said, a little peeved.  
  
Sora looked up, and squinted into the dark night sky. I think it is! Maybe the digimon are there! She stood up.  
  
T.K. smiled. She had finally said something to him other than no.  
  
Yay! Do you think Patamon will be happy to see me? T.K. danced around.  
  
  
  
* * * * *  
  
According to Old Faithful here, we are exactly 2.5 miles from the temple. Izzy patted his laptop. Tai started toward it. Hey! Wait for me! Izzy panted after him, hastily shoving his laptop into his backpack.   
  
They reached the temple. It had started to rain, so Tai yanked on the door. Why... won't... this... door....open... He grunted, pulling on the temple door. Izzy sighed, and rang the small doorbell next to the sign that said, Door sticks. Please ring bell.  
  
Tai fell in the open door when a small digimon opened it while he was pushing against it.  
  
Welcome! My name is Monmon. The small anteater like digimon said.  
  
Izzy giggled.  
  
Somebody had to be stuck with Mon for the prefix, and it was my lucky day. Monmon grumbled. He smiled sweetly. This way to the ballroom.  
  
As they walked, Izzy opened his laptop. Oh boy, Izzy! Now you can wow them with you socializing and new dance moves! Izzy smiled.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Monmon didn't take them to a ballroom. He veered left into a dark chamber. He flung open the door to a dungeon room, and to Izzy's suprise and Tai's natural stupidity...  
  
What are you guys doing here?!? Izzy cried.  
  
Hmmm. Let's put it to a vote. said Sora sarcastically from her hanging cage. Whoever thinks were are being held prisoner by Piedmon until he kills us slowly and painfully in nasty, gorey, graphic ways, say I.  
  
This made T.K. start bawling uncontrollably.  
  
So this whole thing was a trap? I would have never guessed! Tai scratched his head.  
  
Is this a good time to say DUH or what... Matt groaned from a cage sitting on the floor.  
  
Monmon laughed evilly. And now that we have all the digi-destined, we can begin the INQUISITION!  
  
Hey! The Inquisition was in Spain in the 1400's! said Izzy.  
  
But it's so catchy. sighed Monmon.  
  
It's quite a show. smiled Sora.  
  
The Inquisition! Here we go.. Mimi giggled.  
  
You know you're wishin' that we'd go awwayyy... sang Joe.  
  
But the Inquisition's here, and it's here to staaayyyy!!! sang everyone.  
  
Monmon cried.  
  
Hey, Torquemada, whaddya say? sang Sora, Mimi, and Kari.  
  
I just got back from an auto-de-fe... sang Matt.  
  
NOO!!! STOP SINGING!!!   
  
Auto-de-fe? What's an auto-de-fe?   
  
It's something you oughtn't to do, but you do anyway!  
  
And then, to Monmon's horror, they all sang the last verse together, doing a Can-Can.  
  
The Inquisition, what a show! The Inquisition, here we go! We know you're wishing, that we go away... So come you muslims and you jews, we got good news for all of yous, You better change your point of views, today... 'Cause the Inquisition's here, and it's here to stay...  
  
Monmon screamed and dissappered in a flash of blue smoke.  
  
What's with him? Kari said.  
  
Does it matter? He's gone! We're free! Joe cried.  
  
Technically speaking, you arn't free until Tai and I get you out of your cages. Izzy said.  
  
Joe sighed as Tai tried desperatly to open each cage, failed, and moved onto another one.  
  
Izzy went around slowly, using his computer to crack the lock on each one. When Joe (the last person out of his cage) was free, Izzy started to type on his laptop again. Hmm. We seem to be in some sort of a labyrinth. I suggest we get into our same pairs and...  
  
Man, who died and put you in charge? Matt groaned.  
  
Yea! I'm the leader! What I say goes! Tai said, crossing his arms and attempting to look superior.  
  
What do you say then, Tai? T.K. asked.  
  
Huh? Whaddya mean?  
  
Dur, Tai. What do we do now? Sora grumbled.  
  
Umm.. I dunno. Whatever Izzy says I guess.  
  
* * * * *  
  
I think Matt and I were a great couple. Right Matt? Mimi giggled. Matt laughed.  
  
Yea, but that's the only team that worked out. New teams! Joe shouted.  
  
Allright. Sora and Matt will go toget-  
  
NOT A CHANCE IN HELL! screamed Sora and Matt in unison.  
  
Allright. Kari and T.K. will go toget-  
  
NOT A CHANCE IN HELL! screamed Matt and Tai.  
  
T.K. and Kari sighed.  
  
(This goes on for at least an hour or more.)  
  
* * * * *  
  
After exactly one hour, twelve minutes, and thirty-three seconds of arguing, everyone decided on splitting up.  
  
Tai walked down a long hallway that seemed to go on forever. *grumble grumble* I can't beleive this. *mutter mutter* ...hope they all die... *grumbles and muttering* ...serve them right...  
  
Tai walked right into a brick wall. He walked on, his nervous system hadn't kicked in yet. After five minutes... OUCH! THAT REALLY HURT!  
  
He started on. I'll show all of them. I'll find the digimon and prove to them once and for all that I am the best leader and I'll prove it to them once and for all i'll prove to them! He stopped, confused. Did that come out right? He shrugged, and continued.  
  
After five minutes, he stopped talking to himself and was walking slower. He collapsed.  
  
* * * * *  
  
  
YOU LET THEM GET AWAY???!!! Piedmon screamed. YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF CRAP!  
  
I'm sorry, master. But they started singing! You know I can't stand happy, singing, children!  
  
Well now. I'm sorry I yelled at you, Monmon. I will change my ways from now on. FROM NOW ON, NO MORE FOOD UNTIL YOU FIND THOSE BRATTY KIDS! The angry clown screamed.  
  
What do you want to do with them anyway, master?  
  
Piedmon settled back in his throne. Add them to my collection.  
  
* * * * *   
  
_Will the digi-destined live through this horror? Or will they reunite, suddenly and without warning? Will Piedmon capture the digi-destined? And not to mention Fred! Find out, in the next chapter of... A DAY IN THE DIGIWORLD!  
  
* * * * *  
_  
Read and Review!  
  



	2. In which Bob the interviewer makes his d...

Dayin2!

Hey! Second chapter to A Day in the DigiWorld, read and review!  
  
Disclaimer- Don't own Digimon.  
  
* * * * *  
  


A DAY IN THE DIGIWORLD  
  
(In which Bob the interviewer makes his debut.)  


  
Piedmon and Monmon sat happily in the living room drinking some vodka. said Piedmon in a drunk slur, Did I ever tell you about the time that I won a game of poker against Myotismon?  
  
Monmon didn't answer. He had already passed out.  
  
Piedmon didn't stop for an answer. Once we catch these bbbrraaatttyyy kids, I'm going to beat them at poker. How's that for a punshishment, I mean, punishment?  
  
Monmon was still unconscious.  
  
Piedmon took another sip. I'm going off to find those kids now... He stood up, and fell to the ground. Haha! Did you see that, Monmon? I just fell over, like THAT! Piedmon slammed his fist on the ground. Ouch! That reeeaaally hurt... Piedmon sat down on the floor, massaging his hand.   
  
* * * * *  
  
Tai was still unconscious.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Sora paced up and down a hall. There were no doors, no windows, and no exits. _How did I end up here..._ she thought. She scratched her helmet. _Wait! Maybe I could use my helmet to break open the wall!_ She strapped the helmet onto her head, and slammed into the wall head-first.   
  
which isn't a word but means exactly what she felt. She sat down on the floor, whining. This sucks!  
  
Here we have, Sora Takenouchi! Reasonably upset about life now, and blissfully unaware that she is sitting on a trapdoor to her only escape. How do you feel?  
  
Sora: Who the hell are you?  
  
TV Announcer Bob- I am TV Announcer Bob.  
  
Sora- *Censored* No, I mean why are you? When are you? Where are you?   
  
Bob- I am here to interview you, of course. Bandai hired me. So answer my question, already!   
  
Sora- What question?  
  
Bob- How do you feel?  
  
Sora- Now that you ask, I could use some food... HINT HINT!  
  
Bob- I have some power bars... they're a little moldy though...  
  
Sora- *censored* Is the interview done now?  
  
Bob- Sure... I knew you were the hopeless one from the start...  
  
Sora gets very angry at this, and attacks Bob the TV Announcer very savagely and in a primitive manner. Much loss of blood and limbs.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Matt walked down the halls of his cage, mentally recording his thoughts.   
  
Day One. I'm still in the temple. Tai and the others went off in different directions. God, I'm bored. I wish I had someone to talk to. At least I'm not talking to myself.  
  
A man in a sharp suit jumped out at Matt. Hey there! My name is Bob, can I have a- Matt didn't have to look the man in the eye. He kept on walking, simply punching the man unconscious.  
  
Day One- Still no sign of human life. Is this my destiny... Matt smiled. That was a good way to start a bestseller.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Kari wandered around aimlessly. If only Gatomon were here, then everything would be bright and happy... She smiled. All I would have to do was think positive about happy little bunnies and I would glow! Izzy says I am possessed, but what does he know? Kari started to skip as she thought to herself.  
  
Happy little pink bunnies...  
  
Happy little pink bunnies...  
  
* * * * *  
  
Well, I love shopping and stuff. Mimi was lapping up all the attention she could get from Bob the TV announcer.  
  
Is there anything you would like to say to your viewer audience? Bob said into the microphone.  
  
Mimi started talking rapidly. Bob held the microphone to his mouth still, nodding occasionally. He stopped her and put the microphone in front of her, while saying something inaudible to us. Mimi nodded, and Bob took back control of the microphone for the time Mimi spoke.  
  
This goes on for at least two hours.  
  
Bob took the microphone. And there, that's Mimi's recollection of the journey so far in the Digital World!  
  
Crickets chirp.  
  
* * * * *  
  
TK wandered around aimlessly in the halls of the temple. He was bored. Patamon was gone. And he had already eaten all his candy bars. He started to sing a song that Matt had taught him once in church.  
  
There were five, five, constipated men... in the Bible! In the Bible! There were five, five, constipated men, in the Holy book of Moses!  
  
And the first, first, constipated man, his name was Cain; he wasn't Abel... and the first, first, constipated man his name was Cain and he wasn't Abel....  
  
TK skipped along a path singing the last verse as loud as he could. And the fifth! Fifth! Constipated man, his name was Moses; he took the tablets! And the fifth! Fifth! Constipated man, his name was Moses an' he took the taaabbblllletttsss!  
  
TK stopped singing. I wonder what constipated means...  
  
Suddenly out of nowhere, a dart hit TK in the neck. TK looked at it. Ohh! Pretty feathers... He managed to say before he fell to the ground, unconscious.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Tai was still unconscious. Bob dragged Tai off to another section of the temple.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Joe had stopped along the way to take his Vitamin B supplements. 41... 42... 43... wha? He stopped counting.   
  
Hey there! My name is Bob! Can I have a word, for a second?  
  
You made me lose count. As soon as I swallow these pills, sure. Joe sighed and started over. One... Two... Three...  
  
Bob twiddled his thumbs.  
  
67... 68... ghhhacckk... Joe started to foam at the mouth, and collapsed. Bob took off his mask to reveal Piedmon.   
  
My evil plan has worked! I have captured most of the digi-destined! Piedmon picked up Joe. Off... off... and Awwaaaaayyy! He sat on an invisible horse and Monmon appeared out of nowhere.  
  
Monmon, you piece of shit, let's get moving already!  
  
Monmon took two coconuts and rapped them together rapidly in a rhythm similar to a horse trot. Piedmon rode his horse' off into the deepest part of the temple.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Izzy sat typing on his computer when Piedmon returned to the dungeons where he was. His eyes gleamed red.  
  
Master Piedmon returns! Izzy bowed his head, whacking it on the monitor of his laptop.  
  
Thank you for tracking down the children, Izzy. I have tranquilized most of them that were not already unconscious. Piedmon dropped Joe, Mimi, Tai and TK on the floor. Joe was producing mountains of foam from his mouth, rich in vitamin B.  
  
Bwahahahahaha! BWAHAHAHA!  
  
Izzy started to sweat. So... what did you do with Matt, Sora, and Kari?  
  
I couldn't go near Kari, she was talking about... happy things... bunnies... Piedmon shuddered. And Matt and Sora both managed to hurt me much. Piedmon pointed at band-aids on his arms sporting Sesame Street characters.  
  
I see... Izzy typed furiously on his computer. Now if I can just use this combustiouble memory in the hard drive connected to the modem and everyone's digivice... I think it will have enough RAM to connect with the individual persons! A little happy face appeared on the screen. Prodigious! It worked! Izzy smiled.  
  
Piedmon scratched his head.   
  
Izzy looked at him. I can trick the rest of the children into following my directions using this latitude and longitude program on the hardrive connected to the map of this temple, and they will follow my reference to the present chamber!  
  
Piedmon scratched his head.   
  
Izzy sighed. You see this little blinking light? It shows were the rest of the kids are, and I will talk to them through this little gray thingy and they will come to us!  
  
Piedmon clapped his hands.   
  
After a couple of hours, Izzy had managed to track down Sora, Kari and Matt and lead them into the room where Piedmon was. Piedmon knocked them unconscious upon arrival.  
  
Joe foamed more at the mouth, and Monmon slipped on it.  
  
Hahaha! That's comedy for you, right Izzy? Right? Piedmon laughed and whacked Izzy on the back. Izzy snapped out of the trance and stared up at Piedmon with normal eyes.  
  
Damn! Now I better tranquilize him before he gets away! MONMON!  
  
Monmon came running out of the shadows.   
  
Bring me the unnessicarially large pointy thing that makes children fall asleep! Piedmon ordered.  
  
But Izzy typed furiously on his computer and in no time had a defensive shield set up. Gotcha, suckers! and had warped himself out of the temple and outside. Taa Taa For Now!  
  
Damn! I was starting to like that kid! Piedmon whined. But we still have seven out of eight, and all of the digimon, and that's enough for my master plan!  
  
I thought you were going to put them in your collection, master. Monmon said, tentatively.  
  
Shut up! That was so, like, last Thursday!  
  
* * * * *   
  
_What is Piedmon's Master Plan? Will the Digi-Destined live, or just stay unconscious for the rest of their lives? And not to mention Fred! And will Joe ever learn how to count his Vitamin B supplements? Find out in the next chapter of- A DAY IN THE DIGIWORLD!  
  
_* * * * *  
  
_  
_Read and Review!_  
_


	3. In which Tai is used as a battering ram.

dayin3!

Hey! Third chapter, or is it the fourth? Well, whatever it is, here it is!  
  
Disclaimer- I don't own Digimon, and after what I put the poor Digi-Destined through in this fic (especially Sora, TK, and Tai) I probably will never own it anytime soon.  
  
* * * * *  
  


A DAY IN THE DIGIWORLD  
  
(In which Tai is used as a battering ram.)  


  
Day four. Or is it day five? Hey Joe, what's the date? Matt yelled across the cell.  
  
Joe said nothing. Foam dribbled out from his mouth.  
  
Matt rolled his eyes, but turned to Sora instead. Sora? What's the date?  
  
The 29 of February. she grumbled, still trying to rub two sticks together to make a fire.  
  
Hey, thanks! Matt said, happily. Wait a minute...  
  
I can't believe we're stuck here in a jail cell! I mean, we're the good guys! We're supposed to win all the time! Aren't we? Mimi whined.  
  
Hey Mimi, what's the date?   
  
SHUT UP! Mimi screamed, throwing a brick at Matt.  
  
Last thing I heard was that we are going to be Piedmon's new collection. Who knows what that is. Kari sighed.   
  
But nothing is going to happen to us until Piedmon and Monmon find Izzy, right? Matt said tentatively.  
  
We hope. Kari said.  
  
Let's just try to get out of here. Sora said. Umm... anyone got a plan?  
  
Look at the genius. Matt growled.  
  
Hey, are you asking for trouble, punk? Sora yelled.  
  
What if I am!? Matt yelled back.  
  
Guys! The last thing we need is for you two to start fighting. Kari stood between Matt and Sora. I have a plan. Piedmon can't hurt us if we're dead, right? Kari said, looking around for support.  
  
Right... so you suggest we all kill each other? Matt said, glaring at Sora.  
  
That can be arranged. Sora retorted.  
  
No, I mean, we all pretend to be dead when Monmon comes around dinnertime, and then he'll throw us out with the trash, or something.  
  
As if I would go out with TRASH! Mimi cried.  
  
Got a better plan? Kari said.  
  
Mimi shook her head.  
  
Let's play dead, then. Kari said, in a grim, unpleasant voice.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Oh children, ohhh Digital Destined! Monmon said, shaking a can of tuna fish and holding a bottle of Sunny-D. Dinner time! He looked into the cell. They were all laying down, sleeping, or just plain dead. The funny one with the blue hair was still foaming at the mouth.  
  
Oh my! They're... dead! Monmon cried, dropping the tuna. He unlocked the cell door, and waved his hand in front of the one with the large brown Afro's head. He didn't flinch. His eyes were glazed over. A fly settled peacefully in his nose.  
  
Eww! I must go tell Master Piedmon! He ran out the door. On second thought, just in case they're NOT dead... He pulled out the key and locked the cell door, and skipped out of sight.  
  
Awww... man... It didn't work! Matt complained. So what do we do now?  
  
Suddenly, a buzzing sound came from Mimi's digivice. Hello? Hello! Can anyone hear me? This is Izzy! Over!  
  
It's Izzy! squealed Mimi.  
  
...and there was much rejoicing... grumbled Sora.  
  
Izzy? Can you help us get out of this place? Mimi gushed. Pretty please? With sugar and strawberries, and chocolate... and...  
  
Sure, sure, no problemo babe. Mimi growled. Through my little laptop here, I've downloaded a computer generated simulation of the temple. Using your digivices and some excess megabytes and hard drive you should be able to precipitously get out of there!  
  
TK blinked.  
  
Just follow my directions. Wait a gigabyte... we've got one small problem to deal with...  
  
Oh great. Kari mumbled.  
  
The exit is about ummm... oh God!  
  
Matt leaned down on a pile of straw. That can't be good.  
  
There's about 53 doors between your cell and the exit, and they're all locked!  
  
Matt sat up, and grabbed Mimi's digivice. We could just smash the doors down, easy as pie!  
  
They're steel.  
  
Okey dokey then... Matt sat back down on the straw.  
  
Sora sat, thinking. Hey guys, what if we used a battering ram? Something, ahh, about 5 foot 2 inches, fairly sturdy, with a nice hard head...  
  
Everyone immediately looked at the left corner of the cell, where Tai sat happily, sucking his thumb, forgotten about until now...  
  
* * * * *  
  
SLAM  
  
The fifty-third door fell to the ground, and the digi-destined were free from Piedmon and his temple. They all helped to set Tai upright again. How are you feeling, Tai? Matt asked, cautiously.  
  
Oh, I'm just fine, thank you, Susan! He said in a drunken slur.  
  
He's fine. Kari said, dragging out the still unconscious Joe.  
  
Now to find Izzy and our digimon! TK said happily. Pata, Pata, Pata-MON! Pata, Pata, Pata-MON! Pata, Pata... TK sang, doing a little Hawaiian dance to accompany his little song.  
  
SHUT UP! yelled Matt.  
  
A small figure with red hair and a large yellow laptop appeared over the horizon. HEY! LONG TIME, NO SEE!  
  
Yippie! It's the ice cream truck! Tai said, running smack into a tree.  
  
Hey Izzy! Thanks for getting us out of that mess back in the temple... Mimi giggled and batted her eyelashes.  
  
No problemo, babe. Izzy winked and handed her a business card.  
  
Good job, Izzy! You've finally passed with flying colors, section eight: socializing with the opposite sex! Kudos to you!  
  
Izzy beamed.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Drat! I lost them again! Monmon, it's all your fault! Piedmon cried.  
  
Monmon grumbled unspeakable words under his breath.  
  
* * * * *  
  
What chapter are we on, anyway?? Mimi whined.  
  
I don't know. The author doesn't even know. Sora groaned.  
  
Joe's eyes fluttered open. He stood up and wiped the foam off of his mouth and yawned. Did I miss something? he said, smiling.  
  
Everyone glared at him. Joe backed into a tree stump.  
  
Izzy was still typing furiously on his computer. All right, we need to find the Digimon, so I suggest we get back into the pairs that I ASSIGNED and go look for them. Everyone groaned.   
  
Guys, it's the best way. Now look here. I've invented something called a Tele-Scopium Light Molecl- Izzy was cut off as Kari nudged him, and whispered something in his ear.  
  
Oh right! I have here a magic wand. Izzy said, clearly separating every syllable. It takes you to a different part of the Digital World so you can look for our Digimon. Simple?  
  
TK grinned. Magic! Yay!  
  
Now, once you get to your destination, I mean the place where the wand takes you, press the little green thingy here and it will magically return back to me. Understand?  
  
Mumurs of agreement came from the group.   
  
Izzy sighed with relief. All right, now Mimi and Matt will go first. Would you grip a paddle?  
  
Matt and Mimi stared at Izzy.  
  
Izzy cleared his throat. Hold onto one of these parts of the wand. Mimi and Matt smiled, and with a poof and a little dust they were gone. Izzy tapped his foot impatiently as he waited for the wand to return. It instantly reformed itself in his hand.  
  
TK and Sora went next, followed by Kari and Joe. Izzy pocketed the wand and turned to Tai. He was digging in the ground and occasionally screaming. Izzy sighed. Let's just look for the Digimon here...  
  
Tai screamed.  
  
Izzy sat down and started to type on his laptop. Suddenly, noises came from the brush of the forest. Tai sat up, his nerve cells had kicked in earlier. To his surprise, out came all eight digimon.   
  
Hey, guys! Long time no see! Augumon yelled, holding a large burlap bag.  
  
Where did you go? We came back at about noon a few chapters ago to the cave, and you were all gone! said Gatomon.  
  
Err... we went looking for you. Izzy said, pulling his collar, turning red.  
  
Tai put in, saying the first half-sensible thing since the 53 steel doors' incident.  
  
Well, here we are! We went to McDonald's to order some Big Macs, I mean, fruit and berries is getting a little old. Biyomon said. Don't look so sad, Tai. I got you a Happy Meal so you can have a X-Men action figure!   
  
Tai brightened up.  
  
Now what do we do? I sent the others to other parts of the Digital World! They're hundreds of miles away now! Izzy moaned.  
  
I guess that means we have to eat their Big Macs... Gabumon said, licking his lips.  
  
* * * * *   
  
_Will the rest of the group find Tai and Izzy before they eat their Big Macs? Will Piedmon ever succeed in capturing the Digi-Destined? Will Tai ever get his I.Q. back to a regular, healthy level after being bashed into 53 steel doors? Sucks to be you, Tai! And not to mention Fred! Find out in the next chapter of A DAY IN THE DIGIWORLD!  
  
_* * * * *  
  
Read an' Review!  
  
  
  



	4. In which TK and Sora find VillanWorld.

dayin4!

Chapter 4! I'm pretty sure it is, anyway. Tell me if I'm wrong. I recently whacked my head on a kitchen cupboard, and my short term memory hasn't fully recovered yet.  
  
Because of my accident, my short term memory hasn't fully recovered yet.  
  
Disclaimer- Don't own Digimon.  
  
* * * * *  
  


A DAY IN THE DIGIWORLD  
  
(In which TK and Sora find VillanWorld.)  
  
  


TK yanked the velcro straps on his shoes tighter. Sora! Wait for me! he cried, as he watched the red head wander off without him. She stopped, a little reluctant.  
  
TK raced to catch up. Can we stop for a while? My feet hurt.  
  
Sora sighed. What break is this? Twenty-seven, I think. In the last HALF HOUR! she yelled.  
  
TK jutted out his lower lip, wrinkled up his nose, and looked at Sora with his large blue eyes, now tearing up...  
  
Sora threw her hands in the air.   
  
TK hugged Sora.  
  
Stop it! Stop hugging me. I might start to like you. she shuddered, and went to look for sticks to make a fire.  
  
TK sat down on a log, and played with a twig in the dirt. Something rustled in the bushes next to him. TK whirled around. Nothing was there. Something rustled in the bushes in front of him. He whirled around again. Still nothing.  
  
Voices were coming from the trees behind him. Slowly TK turned around, expecting the worst...  
  
GOTCHA! BWAHAHAHA! Something, or somebody attacked TK. They grabbed him by his foot and tied a rope around his feet and arms. TK screamed. The person gagged him. TK screamed louder, through his gag.  
  
The person (behind him) sighed, and bumped him on the head, knocking him unconscious.  
  
* * * * *  
  
TK woke up, feeling water on his head. Sora was looking down at him, holding a damp washcloth over his head.   
  
So you're not dead! Matt would have probably killed me. She sat up on a cot.  
  
TK looked around. Where, where am I?   
  
Dunno. It sure looks like a jail, though. Sora leaned back onto the stone wall. A cot was up against it, and a small window with bars was the only source of light. A toilet was in the corner, with a small table holding cloths and some bread. TK tried to hold his dinner in as he thought about where the water might have come from that was dripping down his forehead.  
  
So what do we do now? TK asked, swallowing.  
  
Sit around, I guess. Until we work out what's going on. I remember being thrown in here. I think Devimon caught me in the forest and tied me up and threw me in here.  
  
Maybe this is the evil digimon's headquarters or something... TK said.  
  
More than likely. Sora answered. Rapping sounds came from out of the window. Sora stood on tiptoe and looked out.  
  
What's going on? TK inquired.  
  
Some kind of a march... all the evil digimon... I see Devimon, Puppetmon, Myotismon.... Sora stopped.  
  
What is it?  
  
These people aren't Digimon! That's Dr. Evil! The Joker, Team Rocket, Snidely Whiplash, Boris and Natasha, It's like all the worst villains in history come together! Sora looked to the other side. My god, there's Mojo-Jojo!  
  
TK's eyes started tearing up. What are they doing out there?  
  
Sora looked around. They're building some kind of thing... a sculpture, I guess.  
  
TK eyed her. Is it made of wood?  
  
Yes, mostly. A kind of inverted L-shape in wood. she answered.  
  
Does it have a little rope hook thing?  
  
Yea, it has a kind of noosey theme to it.   
  
TK crossed his arms. It's gallows. Say it's gallows, I can take it!  
  
Sora sighed. Yea, it's gallows.  
  
TK sobbed. They're building gallows! We're gonna DIE! he screamed through his tears.  
  
Shut up! We're going to get out of here alive, I promise. Sora looked around. Hold on, they're bringing somebody out.  
  
TK sat up.   
  
They're being tied to a stake, and gagged... Sora looked down at TK. It's Bubbles.  
  
BUBBLES?! As in the Powerpuff Girl? TK cried.  
  
Yea! I swear! She's refusing the blindfold... Sora said, watching. TK listened as gunshots were heard from the window. Sora stepped off of the cot.  
  
Now that is something no one should EVER have to see... Sora moaned as she sat down on the cot.  
  
The door to their cell flew open, and Mojo-Jojo strutted in, followed by a tall French man dressed in a medieval costume. On your feet, or you shall not be on your feet and therefore would not be standing! Mojo-Jojo cried.  
  
Sora and TK stood up. The French guy had a sword. Who is that? TK whispered.  
  
I don't know his name, but I think I know where he's from... Sora said back. Her suspicions were confirmed when the man began to speak.  
  
You English Pigdogs! I whave my private parts at your aunties, you sons of silly persohns! You think you cahn escapah our mighty and most powerful armies? I laugh in your general di-rection! said the man in a bad French accent.  
  
Sora rolled her eyes.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Are we going to die, Sora? TK yelled to Sora, as he was being tied up to a stake. Team Rocket was busy covering his feet in straw.  
  
Umm... no! We're just going to be tortured in bloody, graphic ways... Sora yelled back. A noose was around her neck, and the Penguin was helping her onto a stool.  
  
Okay! I was worried there for a moment! TK smiled at Sora.  
  
Sora sighed and tried to free her hands which were tied behind her back. No use. She was more dead than Elvis. More dead than Kareoke. More dead than platform shoes and plaid suspenders...  
  
Suddenly, to everyone's surprise, a jet of light streaked down from the sky and Gennai popped out of it.   
  
said all the villains at once. Not now, ve havee zese kids right vhere ve vant zem! whined Natasha.  
  
Don't you villains ever learn? The good guys always win! he laughed. The villains stared up at him with blank faces. Just read the script. he grumbled.  
  
All the villains pulled out their scripts from their pockets. Sounds of paper rustling came from around the yard. In unison, they all mumbled, Yea, yea, the good guys always win...  
  
Gennai untied TK and freed Sora. Now kids, try to stay out of trouble. You know what I told you from the start: Just say No to evil.  
  
TK and Sora shuffled their feet, and mumbled their apologies.  
  
Go on now, my children. Gennai pushed them away. They waved goodbye, and ran off into the forest.   
  
Gennai looked out into the group of villains and evil. A stray villain screamed, I LOVE YOU, GENNAI!!!!!!  
  
I don't get paid enough for this job. he grumbled.  
  
* * * * *  
  
So whadda we do now, Sora? Huh huh huh? TK jumped and ran to catch up with Sora. They had left the Villains Headquarters and were now on their way to who knows where outside the jail.  
  
Search for the Digimon, I guess.  
  
Do you think Patamon will be happy to see me?  
  
  
  
* * * * *  
  
_Poor little TK, he doesn't get paid enough either... Oh yea! Will the lost Digi-Destined ever be together again with their Digimon? Have Sora and TK seen the last of the villans? And will TK and Gennai ever get paid enough to be on the show? And not to mention Fred! Find out on the next chapter of A DAY IN THE DIGIWORLD!  
  
_* * * * *  
  
Review, and then Read!  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	5. In which Matt and Mimi find Cannibal Isl...

Okay. I'm sure this is the fifth chapter. Enjoy.  
  
Disclaimer- Dishclaimer? We didn't have no garsh darn Dishclaimer back when I was your age. Theshe kids take so much for granted. Garsh darn.  
  
* * * * *  
  
  


A DAY IN THE DIGIWORLD  
  
(In which Matt and Mimi find Cannibal Isle.)  


  
  
MOVE IT! Matt screamed, as he waited for Mimi to catch up with him. God, I thought you were slow before, but this is just insulting!   
  
Mimi glared at him. Can we pleeeesee stop and take a break? My sandal snapped.  
  
Matt sat down on a log. Then he stood back up. Break over. He walked back off.  
  
She sighed, and started to fix her sandal. Matt plopped back down. How are we ever going to find the Digimon? I mean, we're already lost, we're out of food...  
  
Mimi opened her mouth.  
  
...leaves and berries don't count. Matt said. She shut her mouth. We're lost, out of EDIBLE food, and vulnerable to any large Digimon. Our Digimon are more than likely dead, or something.  
  
Mimi cried.  
  
Shut up.  
  
Sorry. I couldn't help myself.  
  
Do you ever get that feeling, like we're just a tiny part of this whole big other world... Matt said, as he stretched out on the grass.  
  
  
  
Like people are just watching us to see how we make it through this hell. Like it's just a game. Or a cartoon, airing every weekday afternoon at 4:30 Central time, and on weekends at 8 and 9:30...  
  
Mimi stared at him.  
  
Never mind. It's like talking to a wall, talking to you... Matt got up and headed off. Mimi sighed and followed, trying to keep up.  
  
* * * * *  
  
So what do we do now? Mimi asked Matt, who was throwing rocks into the sea. They had made it to the edge of the land they were supposed to cover in looking for the Digimon, and were now faced with a large... blue...  
  
Damn puddle. Matt grumbled.   
  
I guess we should make a boat or something, or casually lean against a palm tree.  
  
Matt stared at Mimi. She giggled. Didn't you see that one season two episode, where Davis just leaned against that tree and...  
  
Matt put his hand over her mouth. Shut up! We aren't supposed to know about that yet! He leaned against a tree. It bent over, and the piece of land he and Mimi were standing on floated away into the sea.  
  
I love the Digital World. Matt smiled.  
  
* * * * *  
  
I'm seasick.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Hey, what's that? Matt pointed out into the sea. The green Mimi looked up. I dunno, please don't make me talk... She leaned back over.  
  
I think it's an island! I'll bet the Digimon are there! He pulled out a mini-telescope.  
  
Mimi eyed it.  
  
I stole it from Tai, big whoop... Matt looked at the island. He took my digital camera that I stole from Sora who stole it from Izzy.  
  
Mimi raised an eyebrow.  
  
Full speed ahead! Hey, I wonder if I push the tree down farther if it will go faster. Matt tested his hypothesis out. He kicked the tree until it was at a 90 degree angle. The island promptly stopped no more than a mile from the isle.  
  
Ohhh, real smart one, Matt! You're a couple nuts short of a full pouch. Mimi yelled.  
  
Matt was leaning over the tree, and trying to pry it up into its previous position. he grunted. Now's a good time to start to HELP once in a while!!!  
  
Mimi and Matt both pushed up on the tree, but it wouldn't budge. They both sat down, sweating like Patamons. Mimi looked at the distant isle. So what do we do now? Swim to it?  
  
Matt suddenly grinned evilly. I don't know Mimi, this water might be full of piranhas and sharks and all sorts of nasty sea-faring sorts of monsters. I don't want you taking that risk of ruining you hair.  
  
Mimi smiled. Ooohh, sankuu, Mattie-Chan!   
  
Nope. I don't want to see you getting hurt.  
  
Aww... you're too nice.  
  
MIMI! WATCH OUT BEHIND YOU!! Matt screamed. Mimi whirled around just in time to watch Matt's foot come at her face in slow-motion. She watched the sole of her foot push her off the island and into the water of the ocean.  
  
EeeeeEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHCCCCCCCCKkkkkk! C-c-c-cold!! Mimi shuddered, splashing around.  
  
Matt howled with laughter, as he watched Mimi flail her arms around, trying to swim. Mimi growled and swung out at Matt, knocking him into the water.  
  
He splashed in next to her. Mimi! Don't you know what water does to my HAIR?!?  
  
Mimi gasped for air, trying to keep her head above water. Matt sighed, and his foot hit bottom of the ocean floor. He stood up. The water in the ocean was waist-deep.  
  
Mimi screamed. I CAN'T SWIM!  
  
Matt pulled Mimi upright. She looked down at her feet. Sankuu, Mattie-Chan! You saved my life! Now I must kiss you!  
  
Matt's eyes got wide in horror, and he pushed Mimi back down under the water. Mimi got back up, sputtering. That wasn't very Digi-Destined of you, Matt! MATT! Hey, Matt! Wait for mee! Mimi ran after Matt, who was already halfway to the island.  
  
* * * * *  
  
It's sure dark and scary in this forest. Mimi commented.  
  
Matt trudged on.  
  
Lots of dangerous Digimon here, I suppose.  
  
Matt trudged on.  
  
I'm surprised that you're still here, Matt. Nothing has eaten you yet.  
  
Matt whirled around. And what makes you think that nothing will eat you?  
  
I'm the cute one! Mimi retorted. Matt groaned.   
  
Suddenly, the sound of drums came through the thick jungle. Matt squinted, and he was able to make out small dots of fire, like torches, coming through the jungle.  
  
Mimi looked, too. She saw small figures, like overgrown men coming towards them. They were holding spears and all kinds of various torturing devices. shouted the fattest of the men. the rest shouted in uproar.  
  
Okay. I have two plans. Number One- We sit like lemons and watch the Cannibals tie us up and eat us. Number Two- We attack them with fists, because our Digimon are gone and we have no weapons. Number Three- We run. Now can I have a second vote for number three? Matt said, looking at Mimi.  
  
Three's always been my lucky number.  
  
Let's get moving, then! Matt and Mimi raced away from the raging Cannibals. They ran into another horde of them head-on. The bared their teeth, and knocked both Matt and Mimi on the head with clubs.  
  
Before losing consciousness, Matt managed to stammer, Is it just me, or do we get knocked out quite a lot in this story...  
  
* * * * *  
  
Mimi opened her eyes to see herself in a pot of not quite yet boiling water. Matt was tied up next to her. Good morning. he said, chirpily.  
  
Oh my God. This is the worst date I've ever been on! Mimi cried.  
  
Matt laughed, then seriously looked at Mimi. You're not on a date. he said through gritted teeth.  
  
Mimi looked at Matt. I know this isn't the time and place, but I just wanted to say that I have always thought of you more than a friend.  
  
Mimi waited for Matt's reaction, but got nothing.  
  
I mean, next to Tai... and Izzy, Joe, and once in a while TK, you're the cutest.  
  
Matt sighed. Mimi, I have never liked you. And I never will. You see, there's already somebody else...  
  
I knew it. Sora and you. I should have seen it! Mimi said, crying.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Why didn't you tell me you were gay, then? I mean, if you and Tai couldn't just hide-  
  
Matt yelled. It's... well... it's...  
  
Go on.  
  
It's me. Matt looked away, blushing.  
  
You're kidding. You're in love with yourself. Mimi groaned. How low can someone get?  
  
I knew you would take it the wrong way! I mean, I really do love me. I'm so, perfect for myself. I mean, look at those eyes... and that perfect hair... Matt stared down at his reflection in the soup.  
  
Mimi replied, sarcastically.  
  
Matt kept on staring at himself, lovingly, while Mimi watched the Cannibals do a little dance around the fire. We're doomed. If only I could do something to get us out of here...  
  
... and look at that great bod... Matt continued.  
  
Mimi pulled out her Digivice. I know! I can send a message to Izzy! He can send us his magic wand! We're saved! Mimi yelled, as she sent her message and Izzy's magic wand appeared in her hand. Mimi grabbed Matt's hand and she pushed a little button and in no time they were sitting next to Tai, Izzy, and all of the Digimon.  
  
What were you two little horn-dogs doing... Izzy said, grinning, looking at Matt and Mimi holding hands, covered in thick, red... soup.  
  
You pervert! Mimi yelled, slapping Izzy. I can't believe I thought you were the third cutest!  
  
* * * * *  
  
_Did Mimi and Matt come in time to save their Big Macs? Will the author ever learn how to count? Will I ever stop talking in Italics? Does anybody really even listen to me, anyway? And not to mention Fred! Find out, in the next chapter of A DAY IN THE DIGIWORLD!  
  
_* * * * *  
  
Sooo... whaddya think? Kycool, sorry for deleting this a few times. I hope you're happy, this chapter is therefore dedicated to you! *cuts a big ribbon and throws a handful of confetti into the air*  
  
Read and Review!  



	6. In which Joe and Kari get lost in a webs...

The long-awaited (NOT) sixth chapter to my story! Can you believe it? SIX! God, I really need a life.  
  
Disclaimer- I own all characters, any character likeness, and everything associated with Digimon. Yup. So bow down to me.   
  
* * * * *  
  


A Day in the DigiWorld  
  
(In which Joe and Kari get lost in a website.)  
  


Joe, please stop eating those pills so quickly. I wonder if it's better for your health if you just didn't swallow them at all. Kari said, watching another pill disappear down Joe's throat.  
  
Nope, it's very healthy. I need the iron and calcium. This is my last one, anyway. Joe gulped down the last pill, and stood up, with a little difficulty.  
  
So where do we go now? We're lost in the Digital World, no Digimon, no nothing. Kari said, standing up.  
  
Well, technically we're just lost in a story gone terribly wrong. I mean, what's up with this author, anyways? She actually wrote six chapters to this stupid story?  
  
Tell me about it. Kari laughed. Then suddenly, an idea hit her. Joe! I have a brilliant idea!  
  
So that's what those clanking and whirring sounds were... Joe said.  
  
Kari growled and closed her eyes. Happy... pink... bunnies.... Happy... pink... bunnies....  
  
Joe watched as the small brunette slowly repeated the three words softly. She took a deep breath and looked back at him. My idea was this. If this is only a story, we should be able to get out and in of it. We could just leave this chapter hanging and pop back in during another chapter.   
  
Joe smiled. That's a pretty good idea, Kari! So how do we get out?  
  
Beats me.  
  
Joe rubbed his chin thoughtfully. We have to hitch-hike out.  
  
Kari raised an eyebrow, but said nothing because she had no better ideas. Joe stood on top of a large rock and started to yell.  
  
HEY! ANYBODY! LOOKIN' FOR A RIDE HERE!  
  
Kari shrugged, and stood up on a rock beside him. She casually stuck out her thumb in a hitch-hiker sort of way. A car immediately came rumbling past, and stopped in front of her.   
  
Hey, come on in! Looking for a way out of this story? I'm the guy you wanna know! The name's George. Kari shook George's hand, and stuck out her tounge at Joe, and climbed in.  
  
Joe muttered a thanks to George and got in the car in the backseat. The old car rumbled off through the desert, and out of the story.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Thanks for the ride, George! CALL ME! Kari called after the old car. She turned to Joe. Terrific guy, isn't he?  
  
Joe stuck his hands in his pockets and looked around. Where are we?  
  
They were standing in a large warehouse. Books were piled everywhere, to the ceiling. A small half empty coffee mug on a table, with one small Apple computer switched on next to it. A small sign was taped onto the computer. It read:  
  
_FanFiction.Net  
  
Small independent website, specializing in the publication of stories of many aspiring authors. Keeps every individual story on disc.  
  
Eiskal and Rebert- * * * *  
  
_Well, that's that, then, isn't it? Kari said.  
  
That's what?   
  
All we have to do is find the right book, and take that disc, and we'll go right back to the story. Simple. Kari said, smiling.  
  
Joe and Kari looked at the great warehouse, and it seemed the height of the millions of piles of books had no end. A cricket chirped.  
  
I'll take the left, you take the right. Joe said.  
  
* * * * *  
  
THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE! Joe screamed. His voice echoed off the walls. Kari emerged from under a pile of books.   
  
Whaddit you say?  
  
This is hopeless! We haven't even found a book about DIGIMON yet! Joe moaned. Why did we leave in the first place?  
  
It was your idea.  
  
Was not!  
  
Was too!  
  
Was not!  
  
Was too!  
  
Forget it! Let's just try over in that corner. Joe got up and stalked to the other side of the warehouse. Kari sighed, and stared up at the window close to the ceiling and looked at where Joe was digging through book after book. A bright neon sign read above him read:  
  
_SCIENCE FICTION AND STAR TREK:   
  
_Kari sat down. You've got to be kidding. Kari looked above each pile of books, and read all the signs. Before Gundam Wing and after Pokemon, sat a rather large pile labeled Digimon.  
  
  
  
* * * * *  
  
THIS IS STILL IMPOSSIBLE! Joe cried, as he threw down a book.   
  
But at least we're getting Digimon books. Now keep looking! Kari yelled, digging through a stack. Mimato... Mimato... Mimato... another Mimato... Mimato and Taiora... Mimato... Kari threw book after book behind her.  
  
Joe dug through a similar pile of pink books. Taiora... Taito... Taito... eww. Taito Lemon... He picked it up with his forefinger and thumb and tossed it away.  
  
Here's an interesting one. Joe, Izzy, and some Lubricants. I wonder what that's about. Kari shrugged and tossed it away.  
  
Hey look! I found a book where you and TK get it on! Joe laughed, mockingly.  
  
Give me that! Kari screamed, grabbing the book. She turned away, and silently hid the book under her shirt.  
  
Is there any book that doesn't have ANY romance at all in it? Joe asked.  
  
Not that I know of yet. Kari sighed.  
  
Joe sighed, and looked around. His eyes fell on a small half empty box. It was labeled:  
  
_DIGIMON FANFICTION, NON-ROMANCE.   
  
_  
  
* * * * *  
  
Kari easily lifted the box and dumped the contents in the middle of the room. They dug through the books easily.  
  
What I think of Digimon, Matt Sucks Donkey Balls, and I Hate Him... here it is! A Day in the DigiWorld! Kari picked up a rather faded and torn purple book. She dug through the pages for the disc. It was missing.  
  
Joe? Is there a disc in that box? I think it fell out of the book. Kari said. Joe looked in the box.  
  
  
  
There's no disc in this book...  
  
So that means...  
  
We're haven't even left the story...  
  
  
  
* * * * *  
  
Who keeps on putting those little star-lines in, anyway? Kari yelled. It's not a different scene, we're still here! In the warehouse! Kari threw her hands into the air, and stalked over to the computer, and proceeded to knock it over.  
  
It's that author! She's putting us through this! Damn you! Damn you to hell! Joe yelled, making a cross with his fingers. Damn all writers of Fanfiction! You people SUCK!   
  
That's something I never thought Joe would say. Kari said to herself. Kari scratched her ear with her thumb.  
  
A car came rumbling along the warehouse, knocking over piles of books and the desk, breaking the coffee mug. George stuck his head out the window.  
  
You called?  
  
Kari looked at her thumb. Joe smiled. I love FanFiction.Net.  
  
* * * * *   
  
_Will Joe and Kari trust George to get them back to the right chapter? Will the author ever forgive them? Will FanFiction.Net ever be the same? And not to mention Fred! Find out, in the next chapter of, A DAY IN THE DIGIWORLD!  
  
_* * * * *  
  
Kind of short and confusing, but what the hey? Don't you just love / hate / loathe / dislike / like / spam / worship / idolize / yehaw / scorn FanFiction.Net? Nobody will know unless you tell me! In a review!   
  
SO READ AND REVIEW!_  
  
  
_


	7. In which the children meet a New Evil.

Before you read the chapter, a little note to my good friend Kycool... ^^  
  
I read the bio for the Whales, or Cynthia (Isn't that the name of the bald Barbie on the Rugrats?) and she's really 30? How sad. Keep bashing her. She deserves it.  
  
All righty then! The story! I had to take a break from writing chapters to Yahweh for a while, and here it is! I'm starting to look more professional now, don't ya think?  
  
Disclaimer- Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I don't own Digimon, so don't sue.  
  
* * * * *  
  


A Day in the DigiWorld  
  
(In which the children meet a New Evil.)  
  
By- Crayon  
Dedication- Piedmon's Lady  
  


  
Hey! Sora, Mimi, look at this! Kari yelled, and beckoned the girls to come. She had stolen Izzy's Digital Camera and was watching something.  
  
If you play it in slow motion you can clearly see that Tai did shove that pickle up his nose. Kari giggled. The three girls laughed.  
  
Tai, Izzy, Joe, TK, and Matt sat rather forlorn on the grass. They had all dived for the McDonald's sack at the same time. Matt's hair was crusty with ketchup, TK had onions around his eyes like glasses, mustard caked Joe's glasses, french fries were strewn everywhere, and there was indeed a pickle up Tai's nose.  
  
Patamon digging through the grass for edible french fries. His paw hit something soft. It wasn't a french fry... or was it?  
  
Hey! A french fry! Patamon gobbled it up.  
  
It was a french fry.  
  
He dug around some more. His stubbly hand hit something again, this time it wasn't a french fry..  
  
Kawaii! Another french fry! He ate it in one bite. And choked.   
  
Patamon spit out the slightly gray french fry. He managed to pick it up. It wasn't a french fry at all, but a grayish, squirmy, slimy...  
  
Hello! My name's Polymorphmon, but you can call me Poly! it squealed.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Hey, if you play it in slow motion, it looks like Patamon turned green! Gabumon laughed, as Biyomon tried to wake up the unconscious Patamon.  
  
Sora looked around with Tai's Your First Telescope!, A toy for children who dream with their heads in the clouds.' Made in Taiwan. All Rights Reserved, ®.  
  
What was that thing? It must have been evil. She scanned the ground. Us older kids don't have to worry, though. It will probably take out the younger kids first. Kari and TK gulped. It will suck their brains out... one by one... I bet blondies are a delicacy...   
  
TK whimpered.  
  
The small gray whale-like Digimon looked at the children from her perch in the tree. So many feelings, so little time...  
  
The Digital Monsters had no feelings, they were just data. But the humans... so much food in them.  
  
Poly turned her attention to the redhead with a blue helmet. A strong emotion was coming from her. She was teasing the little kids... a strong emotion indeed. Poly leapt from the tree branch, and latched onto Sora's forehead, and read her thoughts.  
  
_Anything you can do I can do better... Someday I will kill all Ishidas and Kamiyas... and that one... kid... with glasses... Mimi had better stay out of my way before I kick her pink frilly ass into the next pond... I HATE THE DIGIWORLD!!_  
  
YACK! WHAT IS THAT THING?!?! Mimi cried, on seeing the small whale attached like a leech to Sora's forehead.  
  
Patamon woke up and looked at her. It's... it's... Poly. Patamon said dramatically.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Joe stood over Sora, taking her pulse. She's unconscious.  
  
Quick! Let's get out of her before she regains consciousness again! Matt yelled.  
  
Biyomon threw a well aimed Spiral Twister at Matt.  
  
Sora's eyes fluttered, and she woke up. What happened?  
  
My optimum extrapolation is that a outlandish Digimon, that achieves vigor from masticating emotions from society has swindled away an disposition from Sora. Izzy hypothesized.  
  
Every one stared at him.  
  
Izzy sighed. We have got to fight a Digimon that sucks people's feelings out of their brains.  
  
Everyone screamed. Joe ran around in circles. WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE! EVERYONE'S GAY AND WE'RE ALL GONNA DIIIIEEEEEEE!  
  
Sora sat up. Gayism and Lesbianism are cultures of society that should not be ignored. They are, in fact, some of the more popular cultures of the near future, and not to poke fun at.  
  
Everyone stared at her.  
  
Everyone really IS gay and WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!! screamed Joe.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Everyone sat around the campfire except Sora. Sora had traded in her yellow shirt and helmet for a Green peace tee-shirt and a beret. She was using Tai's Your First Telescope!, A toy for children who dream with their heads in the clouds.' Made in Taiwan. All Rights Reserved, ® to try and find her zodiac symbol, Gemini the Twins.  
  
Okay, now that Wonder Woman can't hear us, what the hell happened to Sora? Mimi asked with as much quietness as she could muster.  
  
My hypothesis is... Izzy started.  
  
IN ENGLISH! cried Kari.  
  
Izzy started over. I got a bio of Polymorphmon on my laptop, and she sucks a single emotion from each victim. I assume it took Sora's anger.  
  
Whoa... intense... Matt said, watching Sora release a baby frog into the nearby brook after kissing it on the temple. He turned back to the group. We need the old Sora back.  
  
Palmon stood up. What if Polymorphmon is still here?  
  
Patamon glared out into the frontier of the DigiWorld. She still is. I can smell it.  
  
Tai sniffed. Smells like chicken. Suddenly, the small gray whale-like Digimon lashed out again. This time, it attached to Tai and started to read his emotions.  
  
_This is the song that never ends... it goes on and on my friends! Some people, started singin' it not knowing what it was... and they'll continue singing it forever just because this is the song that never ends...  
  
_Poly unleashed herself from Tai's mind. No feelings there, just a sad, empty, shell of a boy. She grinned on seeing Joe's face, a pinnacle of terror.  
  
She lashed out and stole all Joe's fear.  
  
* * * * *   
  
We gotta get in there and kill that little bugga! I propose, I go in as bait and blast her with a bazooka! Joe slammed the bazookoid into his thick skull. He had traded his knit top for a leather jacket and a dog tag.  
  
I still think there is a better way. We could set up a debate with Polymorphmon. Or, if necessary, a strike. Now don't get too worked up, I promise it won't last long... Sora argued back.  
  
Poly laughed at her creations. Then she caught sight of Kari, closely followed by Matt. Two new emotions. Vanity and Motivation...  
  
* * * * *  
  
HELP US! cried Izzy. WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE! AND SORA'S A LESBIAN!  
  
Kari sat on a log. She was dressed in a gothic style. Way to face the truth, Izzy. We really are going to die. She smiled cruelly.  
  
AND KARI'S A GOTH! Izzy added.  
  
Man... I need a beer... I'm so ugly... and fat... and these pants are make my butt look huge.  
  
AND MATT'S BUTT IS HUGE! Izzy added. He stopped. Eww... I'm a gaywad.  
  
Being gay is like Freedom of Speech. Way to stand up for your beliefs, Izzy.  
  
Shut up, you moron! Now, how'dya load this damn thing? Joe fumbled with some ammunition for his rifle.  
  
AND JOE TURNED INTO JACK THE RIPPER!  
  
And now, I'm coming for you, Izzy... Poly giggled, and she leapt onto Izzy's forehead.  
  
_E=MC Squared. The elements that make up table salt are Sodium and Chlorine. The square route of 5,067,000.301 are the same to the number of equilateral' triangle's right angles to the fifth power divided by the number of hours it takes to get to my grandmother's house by train...  
  
_Poly giggled again, and took Izzy's I.Q.  
  
* * * * *  
  
_What are the last three Digi-Destined, Mimi, Tai, and TK going to do now, that they have no braniac Izzy to get them out of this scrape? Is Sora really gay? And what's up with Joe? Not to mention Fred! Find out, in the next chapter of, A DAY IN THE DIGIWORLD!  
  
_* * * * *  
  
Squee! I bet you can't wait for Part Two of this chapter! So Read and Review!  



	8. In which Supermon and Captain Oink save ...

Guess what? I'm in Kawaii Li'l Lia's Batpig series! Yay! I'm CRAYON PERSON'. Okay, not that flattering... but I'm in a fanfic! Kewlness!   
  
And my Supermon ficcy got deleted! Boo! I dislike FF.Net! So guess who is making an appearance in this chapter... Bwahaha...  
  
This bashes a actual person, who, you ask? Well, I don't really know them' that well, but the rumors I heard are very sad. And the bashing is only here as a present to Kycool and the Kycool Shippers. Love ya!  
  
Disclaimer- I don't own Digimon.  
  
* * * * *  
  


A Day in the DigiWorld  
  
(In which Supermon and Captain Oink save the day.)  
  
By- Crayon  
Dedication- Kawaii Li'l Lia  
  


  
WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!!! screamed Mimi, Tai and TK in perfect unison.  
  
I like cheese... Izzy grinned stupidly, sucking his thumb.   
  
TK started to cry.   
  
From above, an evil laughter came from the top of a tree. The three children and the Digimon looked up. Poly was rolling on her back, cackling.  
  
What do you want, Poly? Augumon cried.  
  
Yea! Stop... stupididizing us... Palmon stumbled over her words.  
  
Gatomon flashed her claws menacingly. I'll come up there and make catnip outa' ya!  
  
Biyomon sighed. And there was another completely unnecessary pun about cats by none other than... cat woman herself...  
  
Gatomon growled. Biyomon backed away slowly.  
  
Patamon, seeing that no one was watching him, slowly slunk off into the forest.  
  
Poly cackled again. I'll make a deal with you all. I will give the Digital Destined back their emotions. Under one condition: You must know my REAL name in three days! No more, no less!  
  
Mimi mumbled.  
  
SILENCE! Petty fool! Poly cried.   
  
And what if we don't know your name in three days? TK asked.  
  
I shall take everybody's emotions! Including yours, Blondie. Poly cackled again.  
  
And what if we figure your name out? Gabumon inquired.  
  
Duh... it's just like the story... we find out her name is Rumplest- Mimi was cut off.  
  
SILENCE! Insolent waif! Poly screamed. If you find out your name, which you won't, I will restore your friend's emotions, and I will leave you alone forever. She smiled wickedly. Do we have a deal?  
  
* * * * *  
  
So now what do we do? Mimi sobbed. Why did you ever say yes, Tai? I was just starting to get used to Sora!  
  
Sora had placed a lei of flowers around her head, and was partaking in a dance of the flowers with some forest animals that were late for the next scene in the Disney movie Bambi.   
  
Tai shrugged. It seemed like the Digi-Destined thing to do.   
  
Now we have only THREE days to find out Polymorphmon's real name, or... our brains will be sucked out and we will turn into things like THAT! Mimi pointed at the group.   
  
Matt's hair was covered in mud, and he was wearing an old trench coat. A stubble was forming around his chin as he took a swig of his brandy. He burped occasionally.  
  
Sora was still dancing with the forest animals.  
  
Joe was shooting at the animals dancing with Sora with his Bazooka. Kari was laughing hysterically next to him, and throwing rocks at the smaller rabbits.  
  
Izzy was busy whacking himself in the head with his laptop, and proclaiming to the world that he still loved cheese.  
  
WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!!! TK howled.  
  
* * * * *  
  
But little did everyone know that they weren't going to die. In a secluded place in the middle of the forest, Patamon had de-digivolved into Tokomon. He had dug out a pink mask and cape made out of silky material. He whistled.  
  
A small blue Digimon came tumbling out of some nearby brush.   
  
You just barely made it, DemiVeemon. Tokomon giggled.  
  
DemiVeemon squeaked, and put on some red briefs and a red cape.   
  
As always... Tokomon smiled.   
  
SUPERMON AND CAPTAIN OINK, TO THE RESCUE! they both shouted, and darted off into the forest.  
  
The dynamic duo ran for several more feet... all right... three feet... and stopped for a break, panting and sweating. They lay down next to a large tree. Smoke was coming from the tree. Or was it?  
  
Hey, that tree's smoking... that's bad for the environment. Supermon said.  
  
Captain Oink shrugged. Itsa' free Digi-Country.  
  
Indeed, the tree was smoking. Or was it?  
  
It was.  
  
Or was it?  
  
Captain Oink took a closer look at the tree. The smoke was coming from behind the tree. From a large bonfire. A bonfire next to... _Polymorphmon's cabin!_  
  
Polymorphmon was cackling evilly like she so loved to do. She used to be about the size of a small worm, but now she had grown to about the size of a small German Shepherd. Around her were several lemmings, giggling like idiots.  
  
Hahaha! I shall have all their emotions! I will become the most powerful Digimon in the whole world! I WILL CONQUER ALL! BWAHAHA!  
  
Bwahaha! Bwahaha! squeaked the lemmings.  
  
SHUT UP AND BOW, INFIDELS! Polymorphmon yelled at the lemmings.  
  
They squeaked and started to kiss her fins.  
  
That's better... for little do those Digital Destined know that... CYNTHIA IS MY NAME! BwaHAHAHA! the former Polymorphmon but now Cynthia cried.  
  
How sad... Supermon cocked an eyebrow.  
  
* * * * *  
  
  
  
Moses the Third.  
  
Bathsheba the Horny.  
  
Agnes the Insane.  
  
No, NO! and NO! cried Cynthia, rocking to and fro with glee.  
  
Mimi sighed. Supermon and Captain Oink winked at her. Well than, what about... Cynthia?  
  
cried Cynthia.  
  
What? I know that's your name! Don't deny it, you (CENSORED)! Mimi cried.  
  
Huh? Sorry, I wasn't paying attention. What did you say, dear? Cynthia asked.  
  
Oh, sorry. Is your name... Cynthia?  
  
Cynthia turned a sickly greenish puke color. THOSE DAMN LEMMINGS TOLD YOU, DIDN'T THEY? GOOD FOR NOTHINGS! I shall have your emotions anyway, waifs! I can't die like this at age 30! I'm not even MARRIED! I haven't even had... never mind... but NOOO!!! Cynthia cried, as she was sucked down a whirlpool of blackness that had appeared under her.  
  
Her lemmings had followed, and were now hurling themselves down into the black, squeaking like crazy.  
  
NO! I SHALL COME BACK! INFIDEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLL....... Cynthia cried one last time as she was consumed by the black. The whirlpool closed up.  
  
That's what they all say. Mimi grinned.  
  
In yo' face, infidel. TK laughed, giving Tai a high-five.  
  
NO! NOT MY LAPTOP! Izzy cried, looking at the remains of his laptop, that were in pieces after whacking it on his head countless times. Sora was nearby, tearing up her lei.  
  
* * * * *  
  
_And once again, the day is saved! Thanks to, SUPERMON AND CAPTAIN OINK! Have the Digi-Destined seen the last of Cynthia and her lemmings? And do you think that Supermon and Captain Oink deserve their own sitcom? I sure do! And not to mention Fred! Find out in the next chapter of, A DAY IN THE DIGIWORLD!  
  
_* * * * *  
  
Review, please. I seriously have no life.  
  
  
  



	9. In which the Digi-Destined finally go ho...

Heylo... sorry I haven't updated lately... I've been pissed off at FF.Net for a while now...   
  
Hey, this is the same chapter for some *cough* the one person who reviewed. :( I forgot to put something in, so I just re-uploaded it.  
  
Disclaimer- Screw Flanders, Screw Flanders, Screw Flanders. I don't own Digimon. By the way, Screw Flanders!  
  
* * * * *  
  


A Day in the DigiWorld  
  
(In which the Digi-Destined finally go home.)  
  
By- Crayon  
Dedication- Kycool (please don't leave!)  
  


  
Screw Flanders! screamed Joe.  
  
I think the author has finally gone insane. Gomamon muttered.  
  
Sora, Matt, Kari, Joe, and Izzy had all been restored to their normal personalities.   
  
Izzy was quietly fixing his laptop, casually stroking it, and talking to it, soothingly. It'll be all right, Lappy. Let me reboot your hard drive and install 40 gigas of internal memory. Ssh... He motioned for all the Digi-Destined to be quiet.  
  
Joe was stuffing pill after pill down his throat.  
  
Kari was back to her normal motivated self, and was playing a hand clapping game with Patamon and Gatomon.  
  
Matt had ran panicking to the nearest river, to restore his hair to the beautiful blonde mass that it should always be, and to change into some clothes that would, accent his eyes and facial features.  
  
Sora was now her usual bitchy self. Biyomon smiled, and lay her head down on Sora's arm. I'm glad you're back to normal, Sora. she chirped.  
  
Shut up, bird brain.   
  
Biyomon sighed happily.  
  
TK looked around with Tai's Your First Telescope!, A toy for children who dream with their heads in the clouds.' Made in Taiwan. All Rights Reserved, ®.   
  
Does something feel funny to you guys? Or is it just my lunch... he mentioned, from his perch on a nearby rock.  
  
Mimi and Palmon looked up at him. Maybe it's the fact that the Digimon had no major roles in this story so far. Palmon mentioned.  
  
No, I feel it too, TK. Mimi looked up in the sky. Hey, that cloud looks like that jewel on your helmet, TK.  
  
TK yanked off his helmet, and hid it behind his back. No, what I meant was, there hasn't been any new enemies to fight with lately. It's been a week now. We haven't done anything.  
  
Suddenly, a large blob of a Digimon popped out of the ground. MUAHAHA! I am Blobmon!  
  
Augumon looked up lazily, and threw a well-aimed Pepper Breath! at Blobmon. Blobmon screamed and ran away to the nearest forest.  
  
Mimi hadn't noticed Blobmon. Yea... you're right, TK.  
  
No Polymorphmon, no Piedmon, no Monmon, no... no anybody. Tentomon said, flying next to TK.  
  
No one spoke. Crickets chirped in the distance.   
  
I want my mommy... Kari cried.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Months passed. Winter changed to Spring. Spring came and went. Summer was followed by Winter. And Spring again. And because we had forgotten to put in the last year, Spring changed directly to Fall.  
  
The Digi-Destined sat around. They didn't speak. They were thinking about their homes, their families... or in some people's cases, the amount of memory it would take to download SimCity 3000 on the computer...  
  
Izzy tried to lighten up the mood. Hey! How about a nice joke! He waited for a response. He got nothing, so he continued. God and Abraham were talking. Abraham said, God, I can't get my computer to work! and God replied, That's all right, Abraham! I will provide the RAM! Izzy laughed hysterically.  
  
No one spoke.  
  
I miss my mommy, too... Izzy started to cry.  
  
The Digi-Destined sat quietly, twiddling their thumbs, their Digimon at their sides. All of them thinking about home now.  
  
_I hate the Digital World! The only good part is Patamon's my Digimon, and he can implode himself from inside and stuff... I want my mommy!  
  
The only pro to the Digital World is all the combustible memory I picked up for Lappy. And the terrific programs. And... I wanna go home!  
  
78... 79... God, if I was at home right now, at least my brother could help me keep track of all my pills.  
  
I miss the shopping, and the malls, and the boys... wait! Tai, Matt, Izzy, Joe and TK are here still... but I miss all the boys that aren't self obsessed, which rules out Matt, and aren't crybabies, which rules out TK and Joe, or that are obsessed with Nintendo, like Izzy, or just plain dumb...   
  
Happy pink bunnies aren't helping my spirit anymore. I miss my mommy and daddy, and I wanna go home, and I wanna take Gatomon home too... stupid Miko who tore my Pikachu plushie is probably dead or something... and Gatomon's much prettier anyways...  
  
I can't stand this hell-hole anymore! If I don't get home to get to my regular hair spray and my terrific barber, Pierre, I'm going to kill somebody...  
  
I want to shoot something. I can't believe I miss my family and my home... but if I go there... I'll miss Biyomon... and... why can't I just kill them all? Where's a gun when you need it...  
  
I can't believe I'm thinking this, but I want to go home as much as everyone else does. As leader of the Digi-Destined, I'm going to get us home! With our Digimon, too! And... stuff...  
  
_Tai stood up. We're going to find a way home! I swear on my crest?  
  
Did our crests just change to gullibility? Dude, you know we can't go home. Matt sighed, and leaned back on a tree stump.  
  
Biyomon sighed. If you find a way home, can we come too?  
  
TK looked at Patamon and smiled. Yea! You can all come home and live with us!  
  
Hell no! My dad would freak if he saw Horn Dog here in his house... Matt patted Gabumon. Sorry... bad choice of words.  
  
I'd defiantly take Augumon! Tai said, hugging the little dinosaur.  
  
Gabumon looked sad. Oh shut up, I'll build you a dog house or something... Matt grumbled. Gabumon perked up.  
  
One problem: How do we get home now that we want to? Palmon said, softly.  
  
TK sat up. Let's all learn how to fly! Then we can fly back home!  
  
Sora rolled her eyes. TK, do you ever learn...  
  
Patamon glared at Sora. Listen to TK!  
  
TK smiled. Everyone stand up! Everyone stood. Now touch your toes! Everyone obeyed. Touch your nose! Poke your belly, and shake like jelly! Now flap those arms and you'll fly like a charm!  
  
Everyone had given up now besides Tai and TK. TK flapped his arms wildly, and proceeded to jump in the air. Tai tried too, and landed face first in a patch of soft moss. TK wasn't as luck. He had landed on Horn Dog.  
  
  
  
* * * * *  
  
One day and night passed by slowly. The children still hadn't figured out how to get home.  
  
They woke up in procession, and slowly made a circle around a small campfire Augumon had started. They sighed in unison.  
  
Kari sat thinking. _There must be someone that knows how to get back home... _A light bulb turned on in her mind.  
  
  
  
Joe groaned. Everyone else stared. Who's George? asked Gatomon.  
  
Kari repeated. When Joe and I were on our own, we thought we could find you guys by leaving the story! George was our taxi-driver to another world! We can call on him and he'll take us back to Earth!  
  
Everyone nodded, smiling. Try it! Tai said.  
  
Kari stuck out her thumb in her perfect hitch-hiker way. A small black Viper pulled up next to the children and Digimon in an instant.  
  
Nice car... Matt admired the Viper.  
  
I was promoted. George said, grinning at Kari. Need a ride?  
  
Kari admired the car, but worried to herself. Do you have room for sixteen in that thing? And can you get us back to Odiba?  
  
Sixteen? Yea... I can try... George grinned again. Odiba? No sweat.  
  
The group cheered. Kari and Gatomon clambered into the front seat. Sora, Biyomon, Mimi, and Palmon took the backseat. Matt took the small seat in between Kari and George.   
  
George looked at the remaining children and Digimon. He pulled out some Duct Tape from his pocket. How much do you weigh... he asked Izzy.  
  
* * * * *  
  
Five minutes later, after Tai, Joe, Gomamon and Augumon had been stuffed into the trunk, Patamon and TK were taped safely onto the roof, and Izzy and Tentomon were tied with long strands of tape onto the hubcap... They were finally going home.  
  
Ready, guys? George looked into the rear view mirror, and Izzy gave him a half hearted thumbs-up.  
  
George shifted the stick shift into drive, and Matt squirmed as it hit him in his... never mind.  
  
READY OR NOT, WE'RE COMING BAAAACCCCKKKK!!! Kari screamed, as the Viper shot off into the Universe.   
  
HOLY BEJEZZUS! DOES EARTH HAVE NO SYMPATHY? CAN WE SAY, SPEED LIMIT??? Izzy cried, as he smashed into the windshield.  
  
* * * * *  
  
_Will the Digi-Destined get home safe and sound? Will Izzy manage not to dent George's new Viper? Will they encounter a *cough* NEW EVIL when they return home in the ever-so-long next chapter? And not to mention Moses! (Fred's on vacation.) Find out in the thrilling, Season Finale of... A DAY IN THE DIGIWORLD!  
  
_* * * * *  
  
The next chapter will be the last. It will be kind of like, the season finale. Ya understand? There will be a second season, but it might take a while to get it out.  
  
Love ya! Love ya more if you review!  
  
**Things Characters actually said on the show:**   


  
Everyone, BLOW! -Matt Ishida_  
_

  
  
  
  



	10. In which the Digi-Destined are home, or ...

Eek! Season Finale of my little story. It might be long, it might not be long. Whatever it is, hold on to your britches, it's gonna be very insane!  
  
Calumon- This chapter contains some content that could be called BASHING'. She bashes people who support some certain couples (Sorato, Mimato, and Taito). It is all in good fun, so don't sue her! She's dissing her favorite couple here! Plee-ze?  
  
Disclaimer- I didn't own it five minutes ago, and I still don't own it. It belongs to people in Japan with very long names.  
  
* * * * *   
  


A Day in the DigiWorld  
  
(In which the Digi-Destined are home, or not.)  
  
By- Crayon  
  


  
screamed Izzy, sending himself once again, into the windshield.  
  
Dammit! That's going to dent! sighed George, patting the place that Izzy's crown hit violently. He parked the car near a large, vast, empty valley. He got out and stuffed his last quarter into the meter. Welcome home... he grumbled.  
  
Kari got out, followed by Gatomon. Gatomon sniffed the air. This doesn't smell like Odiba.  
  
No. I don't see any sewage, rotting fish, or druggies... This isn't Odiba! Kari said, turning to George.  
  
George shrugged.  
  
Everyone else cautiously got out of the car, or untied them self from the roof of the Viper. They all murmured in agreement.  
  
No... if this was Odiba, then I would be the Queen of England! Izzy joked.  
  
Nice joke, Izzy! Now we'll move on to lesson seventeen in your Socializing Handbook: Women! chirped Izzy's computer.  
  
Izzy gulped, took a look at Mimi, and promptly fainted.  
  
Oh dear God, is there a Paramedic around? whined the computer.  
  
* * * * *  
  
George ate the last breath mint from the glove box. I guess I don't understand it... I take people from the Digital World to the Real World every day... are you sure this isn't Japan?  
  
said Joe.  
  
George mumbled nonsense under his breath... trying to solve this mystery.  
  
Sora looked around at the green grass, and the bright sun, and the pink rabbits lolloping about. Ugh. It's all so... real... She threw a rock at a bunny, and Kari started to cry.  
  
George snapped his fingers. I got it! You don't exist!  
  
I don't get it. Tai said.  
  
Well of course you don't, Tai! Augumon smiled.  
  
Oh yea... Tai murmured. Wait a minute... that was an insult! You little b- Tai attacked the yellow dinosaur.  
  
Izzy went over to George. What do you mean, we don't exist? You mean we cease to be? We're no more? We're pushing up daises? We've kicked the bucket?  
  
George shook his head. No, no... What I mean is, I take ordinary humans to the Digital World from their world every day. We're in the real human world.  
  
Everyone blinked.  
  
You... all of you... you're only cartoons to us real people. George said, matter of factly.  
  
I KNEW IT! Matt shouted. I was too good to be true!  
  
Everyone blinked.  
  
So now what? How do we get back to our world? Kari asked, politely.  
  
George shrugged.  
  
* * * * *  
  
The sun burned down on all of the children, and they mopped their brows in the heat of the valley. Mimi had taken the hood and was laying on it with George's sunglasses, trying to get a tan from the reflection of the windshield.  
  
TK had wandered off with Biyomon, taking Tai's Your First Telescope!, A toy for children who dream with their heads in the clouds.' Made in Taiwan. All Rights Reserved, ® up into the mountains surrounding the valley to look around.  
  
Everyone else stayed close to the Viper, sulking or being bored.  
  
TK looked through the telescope. Hey, Biyomon, look over there... what does it look like to you? TK pointed east, and gave the telescope to Biyomon. She looked through it.  
  
Dunno. Looks like a herd of wild buffalo or something. She glanced at the upcoming cloud of dust.  
  
They're chanting something... I can't really hear what they're saying though... Hey, Patamon! C'mere! TK called for his large-eared friend.  
  
Patamon flew up to them both, and Sora tagged along, also. Hey, TK!  
  
Pata, what is that stampede saying? Patamon pricked up his ears, and listened.  
  
He giggled. You wouldn't believe it, but I think they're chanting Yama-Sama!' over and over again!   
  
TK looked puzzled. Sora smiled. Matt has a cult? she laughed.  
  
Matt and Gabumon joined them on the plateau. What about my cult?  
  
TK pointed. They're chanting you're name.  
  
Matt shook his head, airing out his golden hair. I'm such a stud.  
  
They watched as the stampede grew closer and closer. Sora looked around. There was more than one stampede. A second one was coming from the west, and small one was coming from the top of the northern mountains. All were continuously chanting,   
  
George and the rest quickly ran up onto the plateau out of danger from the stampedes. What's going on? yelled Gatomon, over all the chanting and screaming.  
  
I don't know! George screamed back.  
  
They all watched as the groups hit head on in three separate directions. All was quiet, they had all stopped chanting. They children gasped as they saw who and what the stampedes were...  
  
Three very different groups. The first one from the east, cheerleaders and football players. Most of them wore their hair in pigtails. Even some boys sported the piggy look. They held banners and pictures of Matt's face. Some had Mimi and Matt in liplock. The huge flag in the front read, MIMATO FOREVAH!  
  
Matt shuddered, looking away. Mimi smiled, dazed.  
  
The group from the west was much different. Slightly Gothic looking people, wearing dark clothes, and lots of piercings held their banners high. The largest flag had a picture of Matt holding Tai, and Tai was waving a huge bouquet of roses. It read, TAITO LIVES ON! DEATH TO EVERYTHING ELSE!  
  
The smallest of the three groups from the mountain was a mixture of both groups. Most of the people had purple, green, blue or some other odd color of hair. They were freaks, outcasts, to put it bluntly. The smallish flag the front row was carrying sported a picture of Matt and Sora as chibi bunny-rabbits. It read, SORATO: WE WON, SO SHUT UP!  
  
Matt backed slowly up the mountain, and he stepped on a twig. Through the silence, the loud cracking of the stick echoed in the valley. Everyone of the three armies looked up. Matt waved, uncertainly.  
  
screamed someone. Trampling over George's new Viper, they all collided and started to tear each other to bits. The Mimatos attacked with fingernails, pulling the hair of the Taitos. The Taitos proved a worthy fight, by punching everything in sight with their brass knuckles.   
  
The Soratos saw they were greatly outnumbered, and most of them left during the first five minutes.  
  
Kari stood up from her safe spot in the mountains. she screamed, making her voice echo through the valley. Not a sound came from either the Taitos or Mimatos.  
  
Kari cleared her throat. What do you all want, anyway?  
  
A blonde cheerleader walked out. We want Matt! Just give him to us, and we'll leave in peace!  
  
No! Give him to us! screamed a purple-haired girl with long black fingernails. The fight resumed.  
  
Kari screamed again into the crowd, without thinking. WE HAVE MATT!  
  
Everything stopped, and inch by inch, the two armies of very different romances came closer to the safe spot where George, the Digimon, their children, and poor Matt sat out of harm's reach.  
  
Matt looked at them. Kari! YOU IDIOT! he screamed, standing up. The Mimatos and Taitos saw this action.   
  
  
  
* * * * *  
  
Thank God for the National Guard! cried Izzy. His pants had been torn off by a stray Koushiro-Shipper in the midst of all the people, and he sat in the helicopter in only his shirt and a pair of green briefs.  
  
I wonder why no one came after me... Joe sat sulking, as he watched all of the others clean their wounds. Even George had had his shirt ripped off and taken away by a fan.  
  
George looked at the lavatory. He knocked on the door. Hey, Matt! You okay in there?  
  
The door opened and a rather disgruntled Matt limped out. He was wearing only a complimentary Hello Kitty towel around his waist (all his clothes had been stolen by his rabid fans). His face was bruised and his lip was twice its normal size. His hair had been pulled out of his scalp in places, leaving large bald patches.  
  
Doin' better than ever... he squeaked.  
  
Good to hear. George leaned back on the seat.  
  
Palmon looked at George. So... are we ever going to get back home? she whimpered.  
  
George looked at the small green topiary. I'm not sure. But... maybe... na-ah.  
  
  
  
It wouldn't work.  
  
Matt rolled his eyes, and gave George his best Wrath of Yamato Glare . Try us.  
  
Na-ah... it's not worth it.  
  
Sora sauntered over to George with her ripped helmet that had formed a rather sharp point on an edge. George squeaked when the point neared his neck, but instead, Sora directed the sharp edge southward. A flick of my wrist could change your religion, now tell us.  
  
George cleared his throat and backed away. Well, we could always try time travel.  
  
Izzy brightened up. Of course! You're a genius, George! Using the Pygatheron Theory and assuming that if E=mc squared to the hypotenuse of the equilibrium of the speed of light... time travel and relativity should pronounce us home by say... oh... y= axÆ + bx squared to the sum of a right triangle x the time it takes Sora to get pissed off equals the answer to life and death... oh... we'll be home about lunchtime!  
  
On saying all this, Izzy proclaimed George a genius again in many words and kissed him.  
  
Everyone face faulted.  
  
Izzy stood up and threw a fist into the air. Let's do the TIME WARP again!  
  
* * * * *  
  
Thanks, George! Kari yelled after the broken Viper. Call me!  
  
The children stood down in the downtown section of Odiba. Matt was still wearing his Hello Kitty towel. A druggie was fighting a ex-con on the sidewalk. Kari smiled. Now this is more like it!  
  
Gabumon sniffed the air. Now the only thing we have to worry about is George dropping us off in the wrong century. he laughed.  
  
Matt laughed weakly, as he watched a strange girl with spiky brown hair run to him...  
  
OH MY GOSH! It's THE Matt Ishida! He's a CHIBI! GIIIIIRRRRLLLSSSS?!?!  
  
Thousands of teenage girls suddenly appeared behind her, chanting something. It soon became audible to everyone what they were saying...  
  
  
  
* * * * *  
  
_What will happen to Matt now? And not to mention Fred! Guess what? You'll never know because THIS is the last chapter to this series! You all know what that means! Time for a looonnnggg coffee break for me...  
  
_Boss- Davis! DAVIS! Get your @*!? back in here! You're not done yet!  
  
_... must run... evil wildebeasts... grr... run, Davis, run!  
  
_* * * * *  
  
There! It's all done! Now off to finish... *cough* all the other unfinished stories lyin' around here... Toodles!  
  
-Crayon  
  



End file.
